Hi Sarika!!

  🌸Day 1, 2:56 pm “It’s over.” A message peeped on the screen. Tears fell down my eyes, as I replied – “K. If that’s what you want.” It felt like the world came to an end. Losing you was my biggest fear and the worst nightmare. 🌸Day 5, 3:43 am Oh I wished, if I understood how – “Have dinner on time, take care” turned into “It’s your wish to eat or not, bye.” “Baby, I am yours” turned into “Am I yours?” “I’ll be there in five” turned into “I don’t have time today” “Never going to let you sleep crying” turned into “Don’t text me now, bye” “I love you so much, please never leave me behind” turned into “I hate you,  don’t want to see your face now” Oh I wish, he knew how much he hurt me with his words. His words hurt her more than his silence.   🌸Day 9, 2:23 am Saying goodbye to you was the hardest thing to do. It felt like those words got stuck inside my mouth. I couldn’t utter any word, all I could do was just watch you leave and do nothing about it. God, how can I explain

we teach our children, about alphabets and numbers. we teach our children, about ugly and beautiful. we teach our children, about history and economics before we teach them, about culture and heritage. before we teach them, about good touch and bad touch. before we teach them, that its okay to say when they’re uncomfortable and its okay to say sorry, not sorry. We teach them about dog breeds and fish gills, before we tell them this is your body, this is your skin. only yours. Your space is all yours. we teach them to always “think about” before we say “think for” we teach them boys don’t cry, and girls are weak we say “man up”, before we say “express yourself” we say “shut up” before we say “scream aloud. Its okay.” and before we know it, we have wasted decades asking them questions like, “why did you do that?” fathers tell their sons stories about wolves and lions father tell their daughters stories about princesses and happy endings and again we forget to teach them about

Milk becomes alcohol. Chocolates turn into cigarette.  Pocket money changes to salary. Cycles become car. Innocency transforms to maturity. Excitement changes to apathy. Love changes to lust. Friendship changes to something purposeful. Honesty changes to hidden secrets. Fantasies accept the reality. Remember when fairy tales seemed to be real. Times when dad’s shoulder was the best place to fall asleep and mom’s bedtime stories the best. Times when the biggest confusion was to choose the pen color and the worst pain was when knees got skinned off. Days when goodbyes meant just till the next day  and nights when we had no stress and slept peacefully. And we couldn’t wait to grow up.

Dear Mumma✨ Seeing you smile is possibly the best thing of the day❤ I LOVE YOU MUMMA🤍 Waking up with your morning kiss and soft touch on my head is possibly the best feeling ever😘 Getting the half empty shampoo replaced by a new one & clothes on the bed right after bathing is something that only you could do. Knowing that I am late for school, wrapping up my breakfast quickly in the tiffin box, ignoring my screaming is something Dad could never do. While rushing away and slamming the door, I used to stop for slight two seconds and I still miss that kiss you used to give me & how sweetly you used to say, “Bye, come soon. I’ll wait.🥺 Oh God, I swear no one could ever wait for me that way like you used to. 🌸I LOVE YOU,MUMMA❤ I miss how you used to cook my favorite food for lunch & used to wait for me so that we can eat together. Oh god, how much I miss the taste of your hand, I miss how you used to make me eat while I used to check my phone for all unnecessary

Everything hurts. Your actions. Your silence. Your ego. Your hate. YOU. Oh God, you! I feel like screaming, shouting. I want someone to lean on. But I want that someone to be you. I want to be loved, but only by you. But also, I want to be alone from everything and everyone. I don’t want people to know that I am about to break. I am trying not to miss you. But all I can do is, think of you. Every time, every minute. You’re on my mind. Somedays I miss you so much that it is difficult for me  to hide the feelings. Other days, I am so busy with myself that I don’t have any thoughts about you. Missing you is like a routine. I miss you whenever I see two lovers. I miss you on the days I go to Mandir. I miss you when I eat something you like or whenever I need a hug. I miss you in the deepest forms of passion. I miss you when the clock striked 11:11 I missed you when you texted me “I miss you.” I have missed you at night when I wanted to just hug you and sleep. ~I wish you missed

🌸Kuch yadein… Kuch bitaye lamhe. aaj bhi yaad aatein hain,  aakhon mai aasun, par chehre pe aaj bhi muskaan de jaate hain.              🌸 Khuda bhi yun bewafah nikla               itefaaq se takraya, par milwaya nahin. 🌸Ajeeb tarah se yun mohabbat hui humein  itne kareeb se yun mohabbat ko dekha ki laga bas, bas gaya hoga.                     🌸 aap humein                      jaane anjaane hi sahi                      jeena toh seekha gaye                      par apne bina                     jeena seekhana bhul gaye 🌸jitni koshish ki utna hi haath se nikalta gaya ye mohabbat hai sanam isse bandha nahin sambhala jata hai.                 🌸phir ek din aisa bhi aya                      purani tasveero ko dekh kar                      rona nahin aya 🌸aapki chehre ki hasi se humne apna gam bhula diya par mashaallah aapne to hume hi bhula diya              🌸mere alfaaz toh aap samjh gaye                   par umne chupe jazbaaton ka kya 🌸hamari zindagi ki bas yehi kaha