Desires

 This one is for all those humans fighting with themselves, up at 3 am, thinking why they  weren’t enough for someone.
For the ones whose hearts are still beating, but doesn’t feel anything. kinda vauge, kinda relatable.
Hi

I turned 24 last sept..!
thanks, but it’s scary isn’t it?
ageing is scary.
specially when, i don’t have the one
the one, whom i gave my heart
my soul
my bed
my ifs
my buts
my greys
my whites
my full stops
what if, I’m thinking of
full stops, again?

or what if
I refuse to think of full stops
or what if
I refuse to see the greys & the whites

what if
oh wait,
who am I kiddin?

You know
it chokes
with every bite of my guilt
& how I gulp it down,
it chokes

I know how to be gentle
with friends,  even family
but just, not me

I look at her in the mirror
the perfect dress, the perfect make up
that fancy ring, and then

the contact list to get more lost than I am
and, the rusty ring – the priceless memory

And then, for a moment
I stop thinking about full stops
I stop thinking about the greys
I stop thinking about you

I suddenly want to choke
but
on self love.
I want to stick flowers, in place of cages
I want to put music, and dance
I want to sip tea, and live
I want to kiss my laughter & buy myself reds
ROSES
STRAWBERRIES 
CHERRIES
& Limitless LOVE. 

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